


Can't Pretend This

by wakeupstiles



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: (maytavia memori bellecho etc), Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, High School AU, Light Angst, Modern AU, Oblivious Clarke, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Prom, Protective Octavia, Realizing Feelings, fake dating au, faking it au (kind of but different), pining raven, prom au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-27
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-05-23 11:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6114477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wakeupstiles/pseuds/wakeupstiles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Clarke and Raven are unexpectedly nominated for prom queens, they decide to go with it. They’re best friends, pretending to date wouldn’t be <i>that</i> hard.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just Go With It

**Author's Note:**

> like it says in the tags, kind of a faking it au but in the end it's very different
> 
> this will have three chapters
> 
> the second chapter will be longer

Raven was too wrapped up in practicing her run-slide-kick to notice the blonde woman who had run up to the side of the field. The last game of the season was in a week, so she had to make sure that she was ready. Well, it was Raven, and she was always ready for anything, but being the captain of the girl’s soccer team and having a lot of college scholarships depending on this one game meant that she had to be top notch. Better than top notch; she had to be fucking phenomenal.

_“Raven!”_ The woman’s voice was urgent and finally the brunette was stripped from her trance. Her attention left the ball and the goal and shifted towards her impatient friend, who had a look of anxiety all over her pretty face.

“What is it?” Raven asked, wiping a towel over her sweaty face and the back of her neck.

“Have you seen the school paper?” Clarke pulled the folded paper out of her bag and waved it in the air.

Raven shook her head. “No.”

“You need to.” The blonde said urgently, thrusting the paper towards her.

She arched an eyebrow. “Why?” The dark skinned woman asked skeptically, eyeing the paper like it was an alien.

Clarke puffed out her cheeks, then pushed the paper against Raven’s chest. “Just— _look._ ” She urged, her eyes desperate.

Raven sighed, opened the paper and scanned the contents. She furrowed her brows. “What am I looking for?” She questioned, not seeing anything of importance.

“Page two.” The pale woman said.

She looked up at her friend briefly, saw the look of dismay on her face, then flipped the page and immediately her gaze flew to the colorful photo of herself and Clarke right in the middle of the page, **VOTE FOR PROM QUEENS** written right above it. The picture was from two weeks ago; they were hugging each other around the waist, both smiling broadly for the camera, the beach background shining behind them. Raven was staring at Clarke like she was the world and Clarke was staring into the camera, oblivious. Raven could feel her face reddening; she didn’t think her eyes gave away so much—so much about how she really felt for Clarke. “…Oh my god.” She muttered lowly, at a total loss of words.

Clarke nodded furiously. “I know.”

“How is this possible?” Raven asked, taking a seat on the bench beside her. “We’re not even dating!” She wailed, eyes wide and heart pounding. It wasn’t like she was opposed to the idea of dating the blonde woman—hell, she’d dreamed of it for years. But Clarke didn’t feel the same way, so it wouldn’t happen, and she had already come to terms with that.

Clarke shrugged and plopped down beside her. “Everyone thinks we are.” Which was actually true; a lot of people presumed that the two of them were legit dating because of how close they were. Joke was on them, though.

The dark skinned woman hung her head back over the edge of the bench. “Oh my god.” She groaned loudly.

“What do we do?” Her friend questioned.

She shook her head. “I don’t know. You’re on the student council, didn’t you know about this?”

“Yeah.” Clarke rolled her eyes, made a sour face. “They wanted it to be a surprise, apparently.”

“Jesus Christ.” Raven was going to kill them. All of them. _Wells,_ the bastard, was on student council—the president—so he _knew_ about this. _He planned this!_ She shouted in her head. _He planned this—I’m going to kill that son of a bitch._ She promised. Revenge was sweet. Hers was sweeter.

“We should go tell them. Do you want to go tell them?” Clarke’s babbling quickly snapped Raven out of her murderous thoughts. She looked up at the blonde, pondered the question. They could, but everyone had already seen the school paper by now, so they would be expecting it. It wasn’t that Raven cared about what the school thought, it was just…

“We could…or…” She trailed off, a plan circling in her busy mind.

_“Or?”_ Clarke repeated, bouncing her legs up and down, waiting to hear what her brilliant friend had to say.

Raven smirked coyly, gave the pale woman a devilish look, which caused her to raise her eyebrows, waiting for the answer. “ _Or_ we could embrace this.” She said simply, then gave a light shrug like it was no big deal.

Clarke thought it was a pretty big deal. “Why would we do that?” She questioned in exasperation.

“Clarke,” Raven sat up and turned to her, explained, “We’ve been nominated for prom queens. When’s the last time Arkadia High had two prom queens?”

“Um…” She trailed off, scrunched her forehead as she wracked her brain for the answer.

The brunette waited a few seconds, then said matter-of-factly, “Exactly. We’ve had two kings and kings and queens but never two _queens._ ”

Clarke gave her friend a skeptical look. “So you want to pretend to date so that we can win prom queens?”

Raven bit her lip, thought it over once more. Yes, she did. And no, she probably wasn’t thinking it through. Pretending the date the woman she was in love with was probably an awful idea. But they had a chance to change something, and it was a good change, so why not take the opportunity that was handed to them? They would for sure win—if everyone already thought the two of them were dating then they practically had the election in the bag. “Everyone already thinks we’re a couple. So…prom queens would be easy. If you’re down.” She mumbled, her eyes hopeful.

Clarke hesitated, then grinned and said, “Hell yeah, let’s do this.”

Raven grinned back. “This is going to be fun.”

Though she was going to make it a point to give Wells a piece of her mind after she took a shower.

 

* * *

 

  
She spotted him at his locker with Gina, arms around each other’s waists and talking lowly to one another. She marched up to her two friends, not giving a damn if she was ruining the moment they were having. “Gina, Wells,” She greeted with a fake smile and too sweet voice. Wells’ face fell when he saw the woman and Gina’s face morphed to amusement.

“I’m gonna leave you two alone.” The blonde said, letting go of her boyfriend, patting him on the shoulder, giving Raven a wink, and then walking away to her first class of the day.

The man turned to her, a nervous smile plastered on his face. Though he was bigger and much taller than her, she was still something to be feared, especially when she was pissed. He knew what the consequences of his actions would be, but he’d watched Raven pine hopelessly after Clarke for so long, he needed to do _something_ about it. He told Raven just that, which earned him a hard punch to the arm.

“Now is not the time for you to play matchmaker!” She hissed.

He held his arm and winced as she raised her fist again. “I’m sorry.” He said sincerely. Raven’s face fell and she dropped her fist, then crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back against the row of lockers.

“I know you didn’t mean anything bad by it…it’s just a little heads up would have been nice.” She grumbled, looking from his face to his throbbing shoulder and giving him an apologetic smile.

He placed a hand on her shoulder. “I’ll reprint the page. Tell everyone that it was an error.”

She shook her head. “No, don’t. We’re…we’re going to go through with it.”

Wells’ eyebrows rose high. “Are you serious?” He asked incredulously.

The woman shrugged. “We’re fake dating.”

“Oh my god.” He laughed, then gave her a dirty look. “Wait, if you’re not mad then why the hell did you punch me?”

She shrugged again. “You didn’t think I was going to let you get off easy, did you?” She asked slyly.

He rolled his eyes, pushed her shoulder playfully. “Well, you’re welcome.”

“For what?” She questioned.

“Getting the two of you in a relationship.” He winked.

Raven’s face flustered a light pink. “It’s _fake!_ ” She exclaimed.

“Uh-huh.” He put his arm around her shoulders and began leading them towards their first class. “Make sure you thank me at the wedding.”

_“Wells,”_ She was two seconds from punching him again.

“Kidding,” He said lightly, then added, “But seriously.”

She scoffed but said nothing. As she sat through her first period she began to wonder if it really was a good idea to be faking dating Clarke. She convinced herself so quick that it would be fine, that she would be able to handle it, that they were just doing this so that they could prove something at the school, but was it _really_ a good idea?

_Too late now._ She thought, then tried to forget about it as she continued to copy down the notes Mr. Kane was scribbling on the white board. 


	2. It Was Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _It did. I meant nothing._ Clarke repeated in her head, though she didn’t entirely believe it anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know nothing of soccer so yknow don't point any of that stuff out please
> 
> i apologize for the errors i missed; it's late and my eyes hurt, but i think i got most, if not all, of them.

The first week was incredibly easy; all they had to do was hold hands (which they already did before the whole fake dating thing), take pictures, and come up with their campaign speech. Sure their friends didn’t exactly support the whole thing, mostly because they all knew how Raven felt about Clarke, but one cold look from the brunette and they shut up. Raven really believed that she could do it without there being any major consequences.

That was, until Clarke kissed her.

 

* * *

 

  
It was the last game of the season. She’d prepared for this for _months._ All her blood, sweat, and tears had led up to this moment. This moment, where she would make the winning goal like she’d done so many times before, only this time, it meant something. This was the moment that would decide her whole future. This was _The Moment._

She just had to get the damn ball.

Emori had the ball. She was two feet away from her, three members of the other team hot at her heels. Raven was open, save for the girl a few inches behind her, but she wasn’t worried about that, because Echo was coming up the side of Raven and when she got the ball Echo would take care of the other girl.

The goal was right there. _Right there._

“Emori, ball!” The brunette shouted breathlessly, her legs burning from all the constant running, begging her to stop and take a break. She couldn’t, though, not when it was this close. Emori side kicked the ball to her before the girls on the other team tripped her and sent her tumbling to the ground. Raven got the ball, Echo took care of the girl behind her, but more were coming in hot. There was no way she would make it to the goal. So she took a chance; she took a deep breath, slid-kicked the ball, and smacked the ground face first. She looked up, watching the ball glide towards the net, the goalie eagerly waiting for it.

_Come on…come on…_

The ball went into the net. A siren went off, signaling that the game was over. The crowd went berserk. Raven exhaled the large breath she’d been holding and smiled as Echo and Emori pulled her to her feet and embraced her tightly while the rest of their team ran over screaming and cheering, lifting Raven up in their arms and chanting her name.

She did it. She won the game. All that hard work, all the endless nights of staying up and practicing, all the blisters and bruises and spraining her ankles. It all paid off in that moment because she won. The one thing that mattered most to her, and she did it.

Her team set her down as people in the stands rushed the field to join in the joyful madness. “Hey!” She turned to see her friends approaching, all decked out in school spirit. The bright smile never left Raven’s face as they gave her congratulatory hugs.

“You kicked ass.” Bellamy said, putting his arm around Echo as she and Emori joined them. “All three of you did.” He added, kissing his girlfriend’s cheek.

“Ew, I’m sweaty, don’t.” Emori protested, trying to push Murphy away as he went in to kiss her.

He scowled. “I don’t care.” Then grabbed her face and kissed her.

Raven shook her head with a smile at her friends, then turned her attention from them and stood on her tiptoes, trying to see her blonde beauty in the crowd. She was there before the game started, wishing her luck. But she hadn’t come down with the rest of them. Raven was about to ask where Clarke was, but suddenly she spotted her pushing her way through the messy string of people towards her.

“Hey,” The blonde greeted with a wide smile.

“Hey,” Raven greeted back, and before she could say anything else Clarke’s arms were around her and her lips were pressed against hers in a quick, chaste kiss. Raven froze, her eyes saucers, her heart stopping, her mind going blank.

“Just go with it.” Clarke whispered as she pulled away, her smile never fading.

It took a moment for Raven to regain her composure, for her heart to start pumping again. Slowly, dizzily she nodded and let a little smile tug at the corners of her lips. “Right, yeah.” She mumbled, crossing her arms and looking at the ground because she didn’t know what else to do.

Kiss her again? _No._

Ask her about it? _Hell no._

Shut up and try to forget about it? _Impossible but yes._

She wasn’t confused before. She could handle it before. Before Clarke kissed her and fucked everything up, she was fine, it was fine, things were fine. But now…now Clarke had kissed her and everything was a mess. _She_ was a mess. She couldn’t think, she couldn’t breathe, everything was so overwhelming. She believed she could get over her stupid little crush on the woman who didn’t reciprocate those feelings, and for a while she was doing just fine, but now. _Now._ It was a fucking disaster.

She wouldn’t survive until prom. It was a ridiculous decision for them to pretend to date. It was a stupid idea on her part. And it was a stupid choice on Clarke’s part to go along with it and _fucking kiss her!_

“I’m…” Raven tried wrapping her mind around words, but it was hard when her brain was basically mush. “I’m gonna go take a shower…” She finally spit out, her voice a low mumble. She doubted any of them heard her. As she turned and started towards the locker room, she saw Octavia staring at her from her peripheral vision, her face a mixture of worry and anger. Raven tried to give her a reassuring smile, but failed. She left before the younger woman could say anything.

 

* * *

 

  
She welcomed the scolding water pouring over her aching muscles. She just stood there under the steaming waterfall, her hands pressed against the tile wall, her head down and her eyes closed, trying to clear her mind and calm her thoughts. Everyone saw it. Well, all of their friends saw it. Other people saw it, too, and some people probably took pictures. But it wasn’t supposed to mean anything because they were _dating_ and people who dated kissed all the time so it was no big deal. Except that they weren’t dating and it was a big deal. Obviously not to Clarke, but to Raven it was.

“Just calm down, Reyes.” She whispered to herself, taking a deep breath and turning the hot water up more. “It’s not the end of the world.” Then why did it feel like it was? She just won the game of the season, a lot of college scouts were in that crowd tonight, she worked her ass off and it paid off. She should be celebrating, not dwelling on something as petty as a _kiss._

Yet she was.

“Get a grip.” She growled, lathering her hands and running them through her hair. “Stop being a love sick school girl.” That was easier said than done, but she could do it. She was already in the process of getting over Clarke before, why should now be any different? She could do it. She was fine. It was fine.

“What happened out there?” Raven jumped, banging her head against the tile wall in surprise, and cussed loudly when she turned around and saw Octavia standing behind her with her arms crossed and a concerned look on her face. “What happened?” She repeated.

Raven narrowed her eyes, holding her hand over her fluttering heart as she tried to catch her breath. “Don’t worry, I’m fine.” She turned back to the water and began rinsing out her hair. Octavia was silent, waiting for the naked woman to explain. “Are you just going to stand there and watch me?”

“Yes.” She answered, humor light in her tone.

The dark skinned woman sighed, then stated, “She kissed me.”

“I saw. Are you okay?” Octavia’s voice was short and clipped, bordering pissed off.

Raven shrugged. “I’m fine.”

“Raven,” She warned, knowing that her friend was lying.

She turned her head towards Octavia, peaked at her through water dripping lashes. “I said I’m fine.” She tried to sound surer, more sincere, and she hoped she did despite her voice threatening to crack.

Octavia leaned against the wall, sighed, “I know you, Raven, and I know you’re not fine.”

Raven clicked off the water and wrapped a towel around her steaming body. “No, maybe I’m not.” She admitted softly. “But I will be.” She added, trying to sound confident. Octavia raised a skeptical brow. She exhaled deeply and picked at a loose thread on the end of her towel, not meeting the woman’s eyes as she spoke. “The kiss meant nothing. It was a spur of the moment thing. _It’s fine._ ”

They stared at each other, Octavia’s skepticism never wavering and Raven’s annoyance ever growing. She just wanted the conversation to be over. Finally, thankfully, Octavia nodded, “If you say so.” She sighed in defeat.

Raven nodded. “I do. Now get out of here unless you want to join me.” She winked and wiggled her eyebrows playfully.

Octavia rolled her eyes and smiled. “I don’t think Maya would like that very much.”

She shrugged. “She could join, too.”

The woman snorted as she began towards the locker room exit. “I’ll see you at Murphy’s.”

“Bring the drinks!” Raven called as her friend waved and then left her alone once more. She watched the door, making sure she wasn’t coming back in before she started drying off and getting dressed. It wasn’t like she cared if Octavia saw her naked, their conversation while she was in the shower was evident of that, it was just that she didn’t want to continue the conversation because the more she thought about that stupid kiss the more she wanted it to happen again and that was not a thing that was going to happen—or that she should want, considering her goal was to get _over_ Clarke, not continue to be in love with her.

 

* * *

 

 

She wasn’t planning on opening her mouth, really, she wasn’t. She wasn’t going to give her a piece of her mind. She wasn’t going to make a scene. She wasn’t going to make things worse, but goddamn it, when Octavia saw Clarke heading towards the locker room as she was leaving she just snapped.

“You know, it’s a really shitty thing you’re doing.” She muttered as she passed the blonde, whose smile instantly morphed to a frown at the brunette’s hateful words.

“Whoa, what did I do?” Clarke asked in confusion, turning back to look at her friend.

Octavia faced her. “Fake dating Raven.” She spat.

Clarke’s confusion grew. “It—it was her idea!” She sputtered.

The brunette put her hands on her hips, unscathed by the woman’s act of innocence. “It’s still really shitty you’d agree to go along with it, considering.”

The pale woman walked closer, cocked her head to the side. “Considering what?”

Octavia snorted a laugh. “Wow, you really are oblivious.”

“About what?” Clarke nearly shouted, her frustration growing.

The tanned woman shook her head, turned and began walking away again. “Nothing, Clarke, don’t worry about it.”

“No,” She ran after her, grabbed her arm to halt her. “Tell me.” She demanded.

Octavia turned her head to her, her narrowed eyes softening. “She’s in love with you, Clarke.” She sighed lowly.

She let go of her friends arm, took a few steps back, her mouth agape in shock. “W-what? No…no, that’s not—no!” She shook her head furiously, denial and clarity climbing the back of her mind.

The brunette shoved her hands in her pockets and shifted on her heels. “She’s been in love with you since middle school and…it’s just really shitty you’re pretending to date her. It’s fucking with her emotions, I can see it. We all can. Except for you, apparently.” She stifled a laugh and ignored the small, dirty look the blonde gave her. “She’s going to end up getting hurt because of you.” Octavia said softly. She wasn’t trying to be hurtful, (okay, maybe she was, but in her mind Clarke deserved it), it was just the truth, and Clarke needed to hear it, regardless of Raven claiming to be fine. Octavia knew better.

Clarke searched for the right thing to say, but her mind was shot, so all that came out was a choked, “Octavia,”

Her friend shrugged aloofly. “It’s shitty.” She turned and started walking away again, then said over her shoulder, “And kissing her tonight was even shittier. You should be ashamed of yourself.”

The blonde woman was left standing there, completely shocked and utterly speechless. _In love with her. Raven was in love with her. In fucking love with her._ She went over it again and again in her head, but nothing seemed to be adding up—at first. The more she thought about it, the more she played back every little detail, every little encounter that meant nothing, she recognized that it meant _something._

It meant _everything._

To Raven it meant everything.

 _“Fuck!”_ Clarke hissed, falling back against the wall and pulling at her hair. She squeezed her eyes shut, tried to push away the self hatred. Octavia was right; she was a shitty person. She should have paid more attention. She should have known. She loved Raven; the woman was her best friend. _Her best friend._ And she didn’t even know.

“I _am_ shitty.” Clarke muttered, then composed herself as she heard someone approaching from the way she was headed when Octavia stopped her.

“What are you doing lurking in the shadows?” Raven asked, walking up to the blonde and giving her a hug. Clarke stiffened for a few seconds before she returned it, melting against the woman slightly before she pulled away.

Clarke smiled at her, did her best to conceal her disappointment in herself. “Waiting for you.”

Raven cocked an eyebrow, looped her arm through Clarke’s. “I feel honored.”

“That was a great win.” Clarke said quickly, trying to make normal small talk.

“Thanks.” The brunette chirped brightly.

“Is the after party still on?” She questioned.

The woman nodded, fixed her bag on her shoulder. “Yep, at Murphy’s. Wanna take my car?”

“Sure.”

Then they grew quiet. It wasn’t their normal, comfortable silence; it was awkward and concerning. “Something wrong?” Raven asked as they walked towards the emptying parking lot.

Clarke was silent for a few more moments before she pulled Raven to a stop. The brunette gave her friend a questioning look, waiting for her to speak. The woman took a deep breath, then started, “About the kiss…”

Raven felt her face begin to heat up. She cleared her throat, shrugged. “It meant nothing, I know that. All for show.” She gave a tight smile.

Clarke hesitated for a moment, then smiled and nodded. “Yeah…”

She held her hand out to Clarke. “Ready to party?”

“Yeah.” She answered more confidently, linked her fingers with Raven’s and then proceeded towards her car.

 _It did. I meant nothing._ Clarke repeated in her head, though she didn’t entirely believe it anymore.


	3. Yes, Really

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke slid down beside her, leaving just enough space between them for another person to sit. She held her hands in her lap, kept quiet while she looked up at the sky with Raven. Raven kept her mouth shut, too, mostly because she didn’t know what to say and if she opened her mouth the wrong thing would have surely slipped out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i previously mentioned there would be 4 chapters, but i've marked it back down to 3 because 4 would just be filler and i wanted to _get on with it_

“Oh, baby, you look beautiful.” The older woman admired from the doorway, arms crossed, leaning against the threshold with a wide smile on her face. Raven looked herself up and down, turned to either side, smoothed out the soft material several times, sighed with a roll of her eyes and plopped down on her desk chair. “What’s wrong?” Cece asked, brows furrowed as she sat on the edge of Raven’s bed, eyes full of concern.

The girl shrugged, kept her stare trained on the floor. “I just…y’know, prom is supposed to be fun, and I want to have fun tonight, but…” She trailed off, getting back up and standing in front of the full length mirror once more. She checked herself over again, pulled up the front of her low cut dress. It was perfect in every since of the word: dark red silk down to her ankles, a slit up to her thigh on the right side. Black heels to accent, dark hair pulled back in several braids, resting on top of her head in an elegant knot with several curly strands framing her face. Minimal make up, save for the glitter Cece had insisted _(begged!)_ she dust over her face and chest.

Cece got up, stood behind her daughter and smiled at her reflection. “But?” The woman pressed.

She shrugged once more, feeling defeated. “I feel like this whole thing is going to be a disaster.”

“Do you want it to be a disaster?”

“Is that even a question?” Raven countered, her voice flat and monotone.

Her mother chuckled, placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “If you want it to be a good night then don’t dwell on all the things that can go wrong. Focus on having fun with your friends. It’s going to be fine.”

Raven opened her mouth to  argue further, but a bell rang through the house, signaling that someone was at the front door. “Guess it’s too late to change my mind now.” She grumbled, following Cece down the stairs and towards the entrance of the house.

The woman didn’t even give her a warning, didn’t even let her have time to prepare herself; she just pulled open the front door and ushered the blonde and her mother inside, giving them hugs and returning their greetings.

Raven tried adverting her eyes from her date, but it was useless. Once her gaze fell on the pale blonde, Raven’s brain turned to mush and her throat went dry, because there Clarke was, in a long silver dress that clung to every curve perfectly, her hair in curls down her back, her bright eyes popping against black eyeliner and mascara. She was breathtaking and Raven was desperate for her, but she knew it would never happen. Realization that this beautiful woman would never be hers left a sour taste in her mouth and a hollow feeling in her chest.

“Hey,” Clarke gave her a little smile, pulled her against her chest in a tight hug. Raven hugged her back just as tightly. “You look fantastic.” The blonde’s eyes moved up and down Raven’s body, taking in every detail of her attire.

“Thanks,” Raven tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, gave the girl a broad grin, hoped her cheeks weren’t red. “So do you.”

_Lame, Raven, real lame. Can’t you think of something else to say? Like, I don’t know, compliment her back? For fuck’s sake._ She wanted to slap herself in the face, really.

Before they could escape to the limo waiting out front, Abby and Cece took several dozen pictures, making the girls stand in different poses for each one. They hadn’t told them it was fake, that they were a sham. Abby had been excited for Clarke’s prom ever since she was in diapers and Cece was just ecstatic Raven was going in the first place, so they let their mother’s have their moment, kept their mouths shut that it wasn’t real.

Twenty minutes and fifteen impatient texts from Murphy later, the two girls walked hand in hand out of Raven’s house and climbed into the white limo. Clarke slid in behind her, shut the door, and maneuvered herself beside her date. She was practically in Raven’s lap, not that Raven was complaining, but the looks their friends, especially Murphy and Bellamy, were giving her made her want to crawl into a hole and die.

“This limo’s pretty small.” Raven pointed out, shifting on the leather. In comparison to other limos she’d seen on the website, it was much smaller than she thought it would be. There were ten of them in there, so maybe that added to the claustrophobia, but even still. Raven contributed to more than half of the cost, so she expected something a little more… _extravagant._

“Blame Murphy,” Wells said, grabbing a beer from the cooler and passing it to Gina, then getting one for himself. “He’s the one that ordered it.”

“I can’t believe we split the cost of this trash.” She teased.

“Hey!” The man yelped, throwing his arm up and sloshing some beer on Emori and Echo, who glared daggers at him. He settled back, grumbled, “I bought what I could with the time and money we had. Don’t like it, walk, bitch.” He stuck his tongue out at her like a five year old.

“Yeah, fuck you.” She jabbed back, giving him the bird and a wink, then held her hand out across the little break between the seats towards Wells.

“Beer or tequila?” He questioned, rummaging through the cooler.

Raven cocked an eyebrow. “You have straight tequila in there?” He nodded with a mischievous grin. “Hell yeah, te—“

“No.” Clarke chimed in, turned and gave her date a stern look. “You get trashed on tequila and we’re about to be in public. With teachers and police around. I don’t need you getting arrested for public intoxication.” Raven set her lips in a hard line, didn’t bother arguing because Clarke was _right,_ but that was the _point:_ to get so wasted that she wouldn’t remember the night. Yeah, the whole thing had been her plan from the beginning, but after the kiss and now that it was time, she regretted bringing it up because Octavia had been right: it did more bad than good and all she wanted to do was scream.

With that, Wells passed the women two beers and turned the music up. Raven tried to drown her anxious thoughts in the music and alcohol. It worked for a while, until the limo stopped, the music was shut off, and they made their way into the hotel where prom was being held.

Octavia and Maya left the group as soon as they walked in, disappearing into the tangle of teens to go find their other friends, Harper, Monroe, Monty, and Miller. Raven hung back next to the refreshment table, sipping on the cherry punch and wishing for the night to end even though it hadn’t even begun. It was going to be a long night; all she could do was endure.

 

* * *

 

They won, of course. (They were going up against Ontari and Roan, so, really, there was no competition.) Everyone cheered for them. Well, almost everyone; from the stage Raven could see Octavia in the front, her arms crossed tightly with a displeased scowl on her face, her eyes narrowed and her hip popped in the air with scorn.

After getting their crowns they danced, because it was expected of those who won to slow dance together while everyone watched. So they swayed to the music together, rocking in a slow circle with Clarke’s hands on her waist and Raven’s arms around her neck. They were standing so close to each other, Raven swore she could hear Clarke’s heart fluttering. Hers was, too, and her stomach was in a tight knot. They kept eye contact through the song, gentle, steady smiles on their faces. When the music ended, Raven regretfully unlocked her arms from Clarke’s neck and stepped away from the girl, turned and walked out of the room, because if she didn’t then she would have kissed her and she _really_ didn’t want to do that.

She could barely survive one kiss, a mistake kiss, she wouldn’t be able to survive another one, and she doubted their friendship could, either.

 

* * *

 

Raven roamed the halls until she found herself on the roof of the building, sitting on the, feet dangling off, eyes staring up at the stars. It was a chilly night, and any other time she would have been freezing in that flimsy dress, but her body was on fire and the wind felt good against her hot skin. Prom had at least two more hours left to go. She figured she could hide out there until it was over. No one would miss her; they were all too consumed in themselves and their dates.

Despite the torture, it had been fun, but now it was over and she and Clarke would end their fake relationship, go back to being just friends—even though, technically, they hadn’t left—and she would resume pining for Clarke while Clarke went about her normal life in the dark.

Raven could deal with it, she knew, because she’d been dealing with it for so long before.

She was alone for twenty minutes before she heard the roof door open and someone’s heels tapping on the concrete towards her. She expected it to be Octavia, to scold her some more. She was utterly surprised when Clarke slid down beside her, leaving just enough space between them for another person to sit. She held her hands in her lap, kept quiet while she looked up at the sky with Raven. Raven kept her mouth shut, too, mostly because she didn’t know what to say and if she opened her mouth the wrong thing would have surely slipped out.

After a few more moments of silence, Clarke sighed and mumbled, “I don’t want to date you.”

Raven’s breath hitched in her throat and her chest clenched. Her nose began to tingle and her eyes started to burn. She cleared the lump in her throat, said hoarsely, “Okay.” Though she tried to control it as much as possible, Raven’s voice cracked with the threat of sobs.

“No—I mean…” Clarke trailed off, continuing to look up at the twinkling sky, searching for the right words.

“I get it, Clarke.” Raven whispered numbly. She looked towards the ground, wondered if it would kill her if she ‘accidentally’ slipped off the edge. It was five stories and there was concrete, so yeah, she’d probably die. That was her getaway plan if it came down to it. She seriously thought it would.

The blonde shook her head, turned her full body towards the other girl. Raven watched her from her peripheral vision; Clarke reached out to grab her hand but decided against it when Raven stiffened, dropped her hand back in her lap, wringed her fingers together. Clarke furrowed her brow, then said slowly, “I don’t want to _pretend_ to date you.” Raven cocked an eyebrow, waited for her to go on, tried to not get her hopes up. Clarke gave her a little smile. “I want to _actually_ date you.” She finished.

“Me too.” Raven admitted without a second thought, the corner of her lips quirking up. Clarke’s eyes softened and she leaned towards the other girl. Raven leaned forward, too, but leaned back just as fast, her eyebrows high. “Wait, really?” She asked wearily, wondering if she was dreaming, hoping she wasn’t.

The blonde chuckled, rolled her eyes playfully. “Yes, Raven, really.” Then leaned forward again and grabbed the other girl’s face in her hands, skimmed her thumbs over her cheeks. “Really.” She repeated, then touched her lips to Raven’s, who sighed contently into the kiss. She wrapped her arms around the pale girl’s waist, brought her closer, deepened kiss.

“You know, you could have just told me that to begin with. It would have saved me from a whole lot of angst.” Raven muttered against Clarke’s lips as they pulled apart for air.

“Raven,” She whispered, tangling her fingers through the girl’s falling braids.

“Hmm?”

“Kiss me again.”

She couldn’t argue with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and there we go. hope this was worth the wait. if it wasn't then i'm sorry! i lost interest in this a while ago but i really wanted to finish it anyway because i **hate** leaving things unfinished and i didn't wanna let you guys down who've been asking me to finish it. so yeah, if it's not up to par then i'm sorry but this is the best i got. 
> 
> ~~i think it turned out fairly well, though.~~


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